sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
