drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
that is very illegal...i love you.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
