I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Randomize
