so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
