She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
