I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize