nutella sex= disaster
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Randomize
