We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
This house was built for laser tag.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
