Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
