Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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