Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize