whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Randomize
