so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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