I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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