Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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