Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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