we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
