she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Randomize
