Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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