this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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