if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
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