id be glad to
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize