so explain again why im purple
no
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Randomize
