barbara walters just said penis...
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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