Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize