and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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