I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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