Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize