some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
