break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
