Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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