I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
