i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
