Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
i may or may not be watching the land before time
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
