Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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