Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
