dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Randomize
