I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
