dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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