Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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