It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize