I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
