My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
