I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
