and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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