butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
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