is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Randomize