On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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