I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize