Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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